har...blessed or cursed?

Mmm, just read a fren's comment column and found that a lot of girls do not believe in platonic love or feel that friendship will not continue after one fren likes another. *smile*

Well, on my own, i feel that it can happen and platonic love does exist. (i sorta had this thinking since i was young that love has many different kinds: friendship, platonic, romantic, family...) Back when i was in sec school, i hated mixing with girls at first, because girls like to quarrel (i felt). luckily, i changed my thinking and have a balance of both guy and girl frens now. Anyway, i have a very good guy friend who is in US now, studying. I would say he was my best friend since sec school till now, though now it's sorta weird cos he's not really responding, haha. I dunno what's ur kind of friendship but for me, i never felt that the person has to reciprocate your level of friendship. Like, i used to tell one girl friend i treat her as my best friend and i dun care if she doesn't feel that i am hers or treat me like one, same with this guy friend. But somehow, i noe that i enjoy entertaining him with my silly stories and my reciprocation came when in jc, he called me when he was really scared about his exams. That one call returned me all the effort i put into our friendship, i felt. It was the first time he told me something that intimate, something that he wouldn't admit to others. And that was all i needed to feel that our friendship was something special. ( and just to add: I miss him terribly)

And there are many other guys who i can speak to freely, sometimes more than girls because i know they could keep stuff and they are not anxious to make themselves sound even more pathetic when i am already feeling bad. And guys whom i feel, can confide in me (i regard that as one of my special powers, haha, my mutant powers). And somehow, you know that it will never go beyond friendship, because they become brothers. That's when platonic love comes in. And you know that they will never like you beyond too as you are too rubbish and whiny and so on, haha, just, so sisterly. Ok, i admit, sometimes, i become better friends with guys after they have girlfriends because i will feel more relaxed. I don't have to worry about them liking me, nor me liking them. haha

And i've gotten quite a few of these brothers in school now too. I'm very grateful, and abit worried cos i am really dependent on one of them, wonder if i will travel all the way back to whine when i have troubles during attachment. haha

Anyway, with some guys, there is the inevitable phase of confusion, whether you think the guy likes you or you like the guy but i feel that when you grow, you feel that the friendship is so important that you will feel that you wouldn't want to give it up just because of some confusion you both had. So just clear it up and move on! And it can work. It happened to me. I told a fren that i like him and we are still friends. It's hard in the beginning but things are always like that. It always turn for the better. I still like him, and i dun feel the need to give up my liking because liking someone is a happy thing and being liked by someone (maybe the right people) is also a happy thing. we can still be friends, i dun feel hurt or anything. And another good fren once told me he liked me as well, and he got over the phase and we are still friends too. I'm his best friend, in fact. I think it's a forgive and forget thing. It didn't hurt when he told me that he made a mistake because being friends is much more important than being awkward. So i guess, even though there are many guy friends around, I'm more blessed than cursed. Just as friendships go beyond colour, i think it goes beyond sexes too.

A last thought: I feel that sometimes you can't blame the friendship for ending if you hadn't started out with the intention of friendship initially. i mean, sometimes, people try to make the other people like them, and then complain about having to end the friendship when that happens. *cringe* you know what i mean?